Chucking away a 'Comfortable' life

In the beginning…

I worked for a warehousing company. Classic 9-5 job of shooting off emails, responding to clients over the phone & dealing with their requirements in-person over the shop counter. It served me well as work straight out of high school & the career progression enabled me to get out of the warehouse and begin taking on the responsibilities of larger clientele & more complicated projects.

Where it suffered, was in a terribly negative workplace culture of alcohol consumption and gambling, with no positive lifestyle choice being preached and a sadness that seemed to linger with the discussion of growth & travel. This began to weigh on me, as all of my peers seemed dissatisfied in life, stuck in a cycle of feeling comfortable, yet seemed incapable of acting towards positive change.

Me, chuffed to be at work

Driving to the office in Sydney pre-sunrise, tired from a lack of quality sleep, stressing over my lack of free time, and concerned for the future of my life within this career path…

A nagging feeling began to arise in me;

I began to question the life choices & decisions I’d made that led me here

When was I going to give myself time?

Why am I not satisfied with the career progression I’ve made?

Where am I supposed to be?

What is truly going to fulfil me?

I recall my good friend Nick speaking on this beautiful place called Krishna Village in the Northern Rivers of NSW; A land where the rivers flow with an abundance, growing beautiful lush bushland and bringing fertility & colour to the mountain valleys as they meander to the sea. This seemed like a dream to me, that a place like this could exist. An eco-community that was self sustaining through their farms, fully vegan, yoga-focused & thrived off the volunteers that lived with them.

overlooking the lake at Krishna Village

On a whim, I applied to be a volunteer on their property. Maybe, just maybe, I’d be able to experience some true freedom in a place of peace & contempt.

At this time I was reading books on self-help, searching for answers to the questions I was pondering about life, direction, family, morals & godliness. A western novel on mindfulness was particularly memorable, one that really began to get the ball rolling. (Once i'd stumbled upon the writings of Eckhart Tolle, flipping through the pages in St Vincent De Paul, everything began to fall into place. I will highly recommend 'A New Earth' by Tolle for those new to self-help books, a digestible form that includes stories & examples from various religions. whilst remaining impartial & unbiased)

There have been a lot of anxieties within, strong negative perceptions of myself, lack of confidence to express who I am and a lack of ability to feel loved. Working on this mindfulness in the workplace brought space between these feelings, and I began to love how this philosophy was able to slowly shift my mental perceptions and bring me back out of this big shell I’d retreated into. When the shell began opening, I regained strengths of character previously lost. When my confidence began returning, I could truly see why inner work was so important.

One day at work, long after forgetting about my application, I had a falling out with a colleague, the one that didn’t show respect, neglected hard work & acted like a child. He also happened to be my Boss. 

That was it - I was done.

That afternoon, as I’d gotten into the car to drive home, I got a phone call.

Krishna Village - They were ready to have me.

I struggled with this huge life step that was plonked in-front of me. Was I strong enough to take this opportunity? Was this the right direction? What will this open up within me? Am i ready to get un-comfortable?

Take the dive - said Mum. 

No coincidences in this life.